I’ve
been seeing a therapist for six out of an allotted nine sessions. From the
beginning, I’ve been uncomfortable with him. First it was his decision
to stop me from talking about my childhood because he felt we didn’t
have enough sessions to “get into that.” Then I felt that he was
judging me when he told me that I was dependent (struggling financially)
because there was a payoff in it for me, rather than looking at how I was
taught the behavior from an early age and helping me to understand why I
do what I do. Now, today, when I asked him how to build my self-esteem in
business rather than constantly doubting myself, he told me that he thinks
I need to “struggle so that I’ll learn how to hustle.” None
of this feels good to me and I want to quit therapy with him. Am I in
transference, or is my discomfort with his style reason enough to terminate
therapy with him? I’ve been to many therapists in my life and this is
the first time I’ve ever questioned leaving a therapist, which makes
me wonder if I’m just being pushed to my edge, or if I’ve found
a condescending therapist?
You are not being pushed by a condescending therapist,
you’re being pushed by the
managed care system.
And what an uncaring system it
is!
If you have been
to many psychotherapists in your life, that means that you have some deep,
unconscious issues
to resolve. And the fact that you have some deep, unconscious issues to resolve
means that the managed care system wants nothing to do with you because it
will cost them too much money to treat you properly. Their attitude is,
“Stop whining and get cured already!”
So the managed
care companies tell all their treatment providers to “cure” their
patients in just a few sessions—or else. And what is the “or
else”? Well, the managed care companies will stop referring clients
to any psychotherapist who doesn’t give the companies what they
want.
Your psychotherapist,
therefore, is probably scared to death that his income will dry up if he
doesn’t meet the standards demanded of him. In that sense, he’s
not serving your best interests, he’s serving his own best interests
in order to serve the
interests of managed care.
So what can you
do? Well, if you want to ensure that you receive competent treatment that
serves your best interests, pay for it out of your own
pocket.
No
advertising—no sponsor—just the simple truth . . .
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