How
does psychotherapy help a sad person who has a sad existence, when those
circumstances can’t be changed? In other words, how can therapy change
reality—outside of drugs, talking oneself into “positive
thoughts,” or otherwise masking the truth with a labeled
“condition?” If there is real reason(s) to be sad, what can therapy
do other than teach the patient to pretend they aren’t sad?
Psychotherapy does not change reality, nor does it tell
you to lie about reality. In fact, it teaches you to see reality precisely
as it is, clearly and honestly.
Furthermore, part of seeing
reality clearly is seeing the past for what it was. Through psychotherapy
you can face up to and heal all the emotional wounds from the past that linger
in your heart as a festering bitterness that stains everything around you.
Once this bitterness about the past is cleaned up—so that your heart
is filled with
forgiveness and
love, rather than
hate and
anger—then
you can face the present and the future
honestly and
confidently, without
illusions.
Sadness is the
result of feeling that you have been
victimized; once
you step outside the “victim” role, you can see the world objectively
and face life confidently. In other words, even though psychotherapy does
not change reality, it can change your
attitude to reality.
As I say
elsewhere on this
website, life is brutal and unfair, but it doesn’t have to be
misery. Thus it can be said that your task is not to control the painful
circumstances that afflict you; your task is to manage—in a wise and
healthy manner—your emotional reactions to those circumstances.
No
advertising—no sponsor—just the simple truth . . .
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this website has helped you, then